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9/27/2010
Where’s FAMILY in the anti-poverty quiver?
Moniquca Hopkins, 32, has 7 children aged 16 to 6. In highlighting Moniquca’s plight, the Journal Sentinel says one way to fight poverty is with “a quality education combined with a good federal economic policy… A new stimulus package and jobs bill are essential.”
A new stimulus package? A jobs bill? Nowhere in the 1,141-word editorial is the word “family.” Much less “contraception” or “abstinence.” Or horrors – “father.”
Nowhere.
Except to mention that Moniquca is a “single mother.” Which apparently equates to – or explains – acceptable families these days.
In an accompanying video ‘It’s hard raising seven children,’.the caption under the video explains…
She has been through homelessness, incarceration and normal times. Currently she lives in poverty and receives food stamps, as well as a W2 check for $628 per month.
The issue of family is raised – almost peripherally.
It’s hard. It’s hard. I didn’t imagine that it would be this hard – but it’s hard raising kids by yourself. One of my kids’ father’s well, he’s back and forth – being, uh, being incarcerated – back and forth. And uh, one of ‘em I just don’t know where he’s at.
…. I don’t defend myself because I don’t think it’s a situation where I should have to defend myself. Like I said when you have two kids and it’s hard why do you have two kids? You know some have one or two kids, but you know, I have seven, they’re being taken care of to the best that I can. I don’t really look at that as having to defend myself because – they’re mine.
Uh… who else is helping take care of them?
Marriage: America’s #1 Weapon Against Childhood Poverty
In Wisconsin, marriage drops the probability of child poverty by 89%
The rapid rise in out-of-wedlock child bearing is a major cause of high levels of child poverty in Wisconsin.
Some 34.9 percent of single mothers children were poor in 2008 compared to 3.9% of married couples with children.
Single-parent families with children are nearly nine times more likely to be poor than famiies in which the parents are married.
The higher poverty rate among single-mother families is due both to the lower education levels of the mothers and the lower income due to the absence of the father.
It is time yet for questions – or outrage – over the culture and public policy that accepts unwed childbearing as “family?”
Jo Egelhoff, FoxPolitics.net
COMMENTS
Yes,Yes, Yes. Family and family values etc. But what do you do when your preaching doesn't work? A license to bear children? No assistance for the parent of child? Off to the poor house and the orphanage? The fact is that some people are not going to live their lives in the manner that is considered ideal. However, we know that economic development in undeveloped countries leads to lower birth rates, higher education and empowerment of women who are often the most stable base for building their economies. Yet, somehow here in this country if you don't have a job (or day care for your kids) you simply aren't working hard enough. After all there are jobs for everyone who wants one right? Oh, on the relationship between marriage and poverty. True. But the connection is likely reversed. It is the moral standing and sexual education of the people creating children out of wedlock that means they're not getting married rather than somehow simply saying that if they get married they wouldn't have poverty. By the way, when the unmarried daughter of a famous national politician and the father of their out of wedlock child are both invited to be on national talk shows and have their own publicists and this moral failure is not challenged by the most conservative members of our society it is very clear to me that chastising out of wedlock parents is reserved for those out of wedlock parents who don't have money or influence, like the subject of your blog.
dave allen (Mon Sep 27 07:36:19 2010)
You're dead wrong on your assumptions and accusations Dave. My concern is universal; more of us must speak out more often. What are your answers?
Jo (Mon Sep 27 07:41:54 2010)
What assumptions am I wrong on? That economic opportunity and available child care leads to lower birth rate? That chastising poor out of wedlock parents is what is being done instead of chastising rich or famous ones? Since these are the two "accusations " I think I'm on real strong ground here. Just look it up.
dave allen (Mon Sep 27 08:33:28 2010)
Think what you want Dave. My objections to having and raising children out of wedlock extend across the board. Today's blog illustrates one example. I'll say it again. You're out of line to assume and accuse otherwise.
Jo (Mon Sep 27 08:50:54 2010)
In the mid 80's a study was done in Brown county that compared the marriage certificate dates with the date of the birth of the first child for mariages between 1890 and 1922. Surpise suprise over 75% of the "families" were pregnant before marriage. The myth of the ideal is just that myth. The fact is the teen pregnancy rates have been dropping. Keeping young girls barefoot and ignorant is a sure fire way to increase out of wedlock teen pregnancies. Education and contraception are the only effective ways to reduce or eliminate teen pregnancy. We need to grow up and realize that no amount of moralizing will ever alter human nature only education can accomplish a change in behaviors that are core to the survival of our species.
Billie (Mon Sep 27 08:54:29 2010)
Education to what 'moral' standard? Or, if you feel more comfortable without the mention of morality, education to what standard?
Jo (Mon Sep 27 09:02:54 2010)
Jo, your blog nails the missing link. While touting education as solution to poverty, MJS editorial misses what kids are learning in father-less homes. School can never counter the dissonance these kids live with ever day. From the subhead, I could feel the editorial winding up Juan Marichal-style to pitch taxpayers for more school funding.
timbeaux (Mon Sep 27 09:14:02 2010)
Jo:
I agree that a strong family, which is not only husband and wife, but other family ties of brothers, sisters, grandparents, etc. In this particular instance that you mentioned the young woman does definitely have a problem.
I can understand one mistake or even two mistakes in relationships that result in having children outside of wedlock, but seven?
This is no longer a series of mistakes, this is a lifestyle. Why would someone continue having children and not know where half the fathers are? I think there needs to be some accountability for your actions and what your lifestyle has done to the innocent children you have brought into the world.
It seems we as a society are more and more willing to not hold people accountable and blame it on anything but the person themselves. We have lost accountability and replaced it with accommodation.
Mike Thomas (Mon Sep 27 09:51:18 2010)
Oh dear. This is a subject on which I could on a GREAT length, but I will do my best to be succinct.
I'm going to go way out on a limb here: Contraception is part and parcel of the problem. Contraception says to us: "yes, you can indulge yourself and ignore responsibility."
Contraception encourages sex for self-indulgence. (Just ask Planned Parenthood, who has spent decades ramming self-indulgence down the throats of youth to create a market for their "services.") Contraception reduces sex to self-indulgence, reducing human life (from which sex springs) to a bi-product - and an undesirable one at that. Contraception impinges on the dignity of the act, and impinges on the dignity of its natural consequence - human life. Contraception "enables" couples to "enjoy each other" (use each other) without making any commitments to each other, and to confidently ignore the responsibility due to the act. Contraception enables and promotes sexual promiscuity. It breaks down human dignity, it breaks down mutual respect, it breaks down self-respect, it breaks down marriage and the family.
This is no moral argument, so don't get your undies in a bundle. Use your head. Critical thinking.
Abortion proliderates because contraception proliferates. Promiscuity proliferates because contraception proliferates. And irresponsible sex proliferates because contraception proliferates.
The widespread use and advertisements for it imply to youth that sex is really like eating pie. Television suggests that it's an abnormal child that hasn't been sexually active by the 8th grade.
Jo points to something critically important - and that's family - as in Father, Mother, and children.
Contraception won't solve this problem. Contraception will make it worse, as it has been for the past half-century.
Abstinence is the only responsible answer. And wouldn't you know, it's also the most dignified in part because it requires self-control.
Hard enough already, for some. We don't need to make it harder by getting it into young people's heads that it's quite alright to fool around. Habits die hard.
Do I suggest bedroom police? Absolutely not. I suggest watching very closely who your children hang out with, being very involved in their education, removing them from the nefarious sex ed classes that now have to meet Madison's pro-LGBT agenda, and instilling in your children a deep sense of personal dignity and respect for the act. Not an easy task in today's day and age. All the more reason to be vigilant.
And before anyone tries to tell me that I can't force my morals on others - I am just observing human psychology, and I could make the same argument against the vile contagion in which our educational system is immersed.
Don't tell me this woman needs to contracept. Tell her she's worthy of more respect than to be used by men, and to protect and defend her dignity rather than giving it away. And the same to teenagers, in spite of all social pressure to the contrary. We aren't animals. Let's not act like them. Let's not use each other. Let's be responsible, make and keep our commitments, and put our energy into building and maintaining strong and stable FAMILY.
Andrew Ellis (Mon Sep 27 10:29:15 2010)
Which is worse for the U.S. economy: a mother of seven taking home food stamps and a W2 monthly check for $638 or a corporate CEO making $27 million a year taking home a $40 million bonus after running the company into bankruptcy? Hmmmm. Isn't it great demonizing others with simplistic descriptions. (Hint: they both are economic problems for society that need serious moral and ethical attention.)
Dennis (Mon Sep 27 11:31:31 2010)
There is no substitute for family. It is the oldest institution on the planet, even preceding religion and government. Without strong families cultures eventually disentegrate. The example of the unmarried mother of seven verifies this. I would also like to point out that the young mother must have only been 15 years old when she conceived her first child. I hope this was investigated and that someone was held responsible, but I doubt it. Things will get better when we once again confine cohabitation and sexual intercourse to those who are married and we vigorously prosecute the statutory rape of vulnerable females like the one featured.
Peggy (Mon Sep 27 12:45:08 2010)
I recognize a couple of the comments so far as being elements of the nature vs. nurture debate. The fact is that poverty breeds poverty, and it is extremely difficult to break the cycle. The welfare state is not the answer, but neither is leaving people to their own devices - that's how the situation occurred in the first place. What's amazing to me is that as a society we cannot agree at least on primary cause. It's useless to treat the symptoms as the original commenter describes - that will not curb the growing problem. What we need to do is grow up, identify high-risk children and get started with education before puberty. I'm not talking sex-ed, but rather family ed and future planning, and be realistic. Start a program, a curriculum for a healthy lifestyle, and introduce age-appropriate subject and engage children. I stress age-appropriate. Then, most importantly, hold parents to a higher standard of responsibility to their children. Or is the very concept politically-incorrect?
emike (Mon Sep 27 15:59:40 2010)
Jo,
You simply ignore the media's infatuation with the rich and popular single parents and try to lay the blame on the typical poor (usually minority) mother. The willingness to deplore (or ignore) the one while also rejecting education and other options that do improve ones chances show that being poor is the essential problem.
dave allen (Mon Sep 27 21:15:11 2010)
Dave, if people like George Soros and Bill and Melinda Gates put their money where their mouths were, people who needed help would get real help, rather than the gobs of money going to pro-abortion, pro-sexual promiscuity, pro-sexual-deviant rot that offers to help people by encouraging them to give up on their dignity and just "get down to business."
I love how you say that being poor is the essential problem. Certainly it aint easy to pull oneself out of poverty. Just like its hard for someone with a broken leg to learn how to walk again. Now, you can call people like myself careless, emotionless, feelingless snobs, but I would much rather give the guy in the wheelchair the tools and encouragement he needs to get back on his own two feet then just hand him a wheelchair and tell him he's going to be needing this. In the same manner I'd rather give someone in poverty the tools and encouragement to get back -or for the first time- on their own two feet than to insinuate that they're just too damn stupid and inept to improve themselves and give them what they need without encouraging them to improve their level of self-sufficiency. On the one hand you've got what I call genuine charity - that respects another's dignity and potential and tries to help build off of it. On the other hand you've got something altogether different, I don't know what to call it - that takes a high and mighty throne of superior intelligence and aptitude and a total condescension toward anyone who struggles as uneducated and hopeless and in permanent need of hand to feed them. Funny thing is some of the most educated people in human history were complete idiots, and some of the most intelligent people in the world were uneducated. And generally speaking, intelligent people tend to regard their fellow man as equals, with equal potential, while educated people tend to regard their fellow man as either an equal, or an uneducated and hopeless idiot.
"Blessed are the poor..." oh dear God! -I mean, just plain "oh dear!"
There is so much opportunity in adversity, Dave. So much opportunity. And you would squandre it on meritless conpulsory "charity?"
Andrew Ellis (Mon Sep 27 21:49:13 2010)
Dave and Dennis - As much as you seem to think I'm all knowing and have unlimited time to pursue topics you wrongly accuse me of ignoring... you're both welcome to set up your own blog and write to your hearts' content on whatever topics you choose to encompass. Remember... there are only so many hours in a day - so you just might not cover every topic in the universe. Lacking your own blog, if you'd like to submit a quality commentary piece of your own to FoxPol, I'll be glad to consider publishing it. 600 words max please.
Jo (Mon Sep 27 21:49:54 2010)
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